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Stand Still, Sing Pretty

by Jennifer Boyer – July 28, 2011

It took a few songs for me to realize that the statuesque Sia was not going to do much more than stand behind her microphone, feet planted firmly on the stage hip width apart, practically immobile with a goofy grin frozen to her mouth. Throughout “The Fight,” “Buttons” and the requisite Madonna cover “Oh Father,”  singer/songwriter Sia appeared almost psychotic as her freakishly large smile remained plastered on her face when not using her lips to sing.


“We’re going to play a new song,” announced the Aussie at Chicago’s Metro. “I’m writing an album with Nick Valensi from The Strokes,” revealed the singer before giving fans a taste of what is to come with “Hostage.” A black bra was thrown at Sia’s guitarist as he attempted to begin “Big Girl Little Girl.” Even mellow female singer/songwriters experience the life of a rock star.

“Something amazing is about to happen, but it will require a bit of patience on your part,” exclaimed a secretive Sia. “In the meantime, maybe the band could play some cheesy cruise music.” And that they did as two young women climbed on stage and proceeded to get engaged as one kneeled before the other and proposed marriage.


“These are braided vaginas on my dress,” conceded Sia as she proudly pointed to the embroidered patterns (oh the colors!) lining the neckline of her ensemble. “Vaginas on my shoes,” she said taking a moment to kick her feet up and display the high heels adorned with depictions of female genitalia after performing “I Go To Sleep” and before “The Co-Dependent.”

“You Have Been Loved” was followed by a fan’s passionate outcry of “I love you!” to which Sia responded with carefully chosen words, “I like you very much.” An honest woman, Sia is. “Soon We’ll Be Found” had the singer executing the accompanying sign language that corresponds with the tune’s lyrics. “We have one more song and then we’re gonna do a fake encore and then two more songs,” admitted the songstress after the happy-go-lucky “Never Gonna Leave Me.”


“I think encores are silly. I had some managers who told me I’m robbing people of a climactic experience,” recalled the quirky artist before slowing things down with the sentimental “I’m In Here.” Leaving the stage for a mere moment or two to build the suspense required for a true “climactic experience,” Sia was greeted with one person’s plead to “Take it off!”


Not at all fazed by the request (more like demand), Sia dubiously replied, “Take it off? You’re really persistent. You’re gonna get somewhere in life – jail.” One dance track (“Clap Your Hands”) and one prime time drama placement song (“Breathe Me”) later, Sia had given fans the time of their (overheated) lives.

To read about singer/songwriter Michelle Branch, click here and for past Metro performer Robyn, click here.

To read more about Jennifer Boyer and why she is so Cheeky, please click here.

About the Author: Jennifer Boyer

Jennifer Boyer photographs and reviews artists live in concert with the added bonus of interviewing her favorite musicians, singers, songwriters and producers. She resides in New York City where she captures and witnesses great moments in live music. Jennifer’s obsession with music and concerts has turned two of her hobbies into dreams come true.